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Stephen Covey : Emotional Bank Deposits

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In his seminal book, “Seven Habits of Highly Effective People,” Stephen Covey describes a process of making deposits into an “emotional bank account” with those you love.

The six major types of deposits that build the Emotional Bank Account:

  • Understanding the Individual. Few people actually take the time to listen to and understand someone. Be one of those people. Slow down. Seek to understand.

  • Attending to Little Things. Do you consistently do the little things to show your love? Little forms of disrespect are large withdrawals. Make little deposits of kindness all the time.

  • Keeping Commitments. Keep your Account high by honoring your commitments. One of the easiest ways to make huge withdrawals is to not keep your word.

  • Clarifying Expectations. A cause of most relationship challenges is rooted in conflicting or ambiguous expectations around roles and goals. Take the time to clarify.

  • Showing Personal Integrity. Integrity includes but goes beyond honesty. Do your actions truly line up with your words? Be integrated. Make big deposits.

  • Apologizing Sincerely When You Make a Withdrawal. Learn how to say “I was wrong. I’m deeply sorry.” It takes a huge amount of character to apologize sincerely and quickly. Do it.

Here’s to being Emotional Bank Account billionaires. :)


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